Creating a Weekend Routine for Autistic Children

Structured Activities & Routines: Making Weekends Predictable

For many families with autistic children, weekends and holidays can be a mixed bag of excitement and anxiety. With the school routine disrupted, unstructured days may feel chaotic or overwhelming without a plan. Yet weekends also offer invaluable opportunities for quality family time, exploring new experiences, and celebrating each child’s unique strengths and interests.

Establishing a consistent, predictable weekend routine is key to reducing stress and enhancing feelings of security for autistic children. A thoughtful routine provides a scaffolding for the day while allowing flexibility to tailor activities to each child’s sensory needs, passions, and abilities. With an affirming, neurodiversity-positive approach, weekend routines become more than just schedules – they are an exercise in understanding, empowerment, and developing confidence.

Understanding the Importance of Routine

Routines and schedules are not about conformity but rather about meeting core needs. For autistic children, adhering to familiar routines serves vital purposes:

1. Reducing Anxiety and Overwhelming Feelings
   The predictability and consistency of a routine helps lower stress and anxiety levels. Not knowing what comes next throughout the day can heighten overwhelmed feelings. Routines provide comfort through their reliability.
2. Enhancing Communication and Independence
   Visual schedules, checklists, and structured routines aid communication and independence, without over-relying on receptive spoken language abilities. Your child can check the schedule independently to understand expectations and build autonomy skills.
3. Boosting Positive Behavior and Cooperation
   When children know precisely what will happen and what is expected of them, they are more regulated and able to cooperate. The certainty of a routine minimizes ambiguity that could trigger confusion or meltdowns. Clear schedules support positive behaviour.
4. Making Space for Accommodation and Access Needs
   Routines create opportunities to plan for accommodations, whether bringing noise-cancelling headphones on outings, building in regular bathroom breaks, or simply dedicating quiet times to recuperate from sensory and social demands.

In essence, routines create scaffolding for children to comprehend their world in an organised, predictable and dependable way. The stability provided improves wellbeing when their fundamental needs are met and stress/anxiety is reduced.

Tips for Creating a Weekend Routine

Involve Your Child From the Start – The most affirming routines are co-created by incorporating your child’s voice, preferences, and interests from the beginning. You might ask open-ended questions like:

• “What are some of your favourite activities you’d like to do this weekend?”
• “When you think about our weekend routine, what are the key things that we include?”
• “How can we make sure your needs for [quiet time, movement breaks, etc.] are addressed?”

Break Down the Day Into Clear Segments – With your child’s input, divide the weekend day into broad sections that make sense based on their regular sleep/wake cycles and mealtimes. You might use key times like:

• Morning
• Late Morning
• Lunch
• Afternoon
• Afternoon Quiet Time
• Evening

Develop a predictable Morning Routine – Starting the day in a structured, predictable way helps set the tone. Include step-by-step tasks like:

• Waking up and getting dressed (doesn’t need to be in that order – whatever works)
• Hygiene tasks like brushing teeth/washing face
• Having breakfast (I get the logistics of my routine ready the night before – kettle filled, coffee ready in the pot etc, so I can do these whilst focussing on the kids)

Use visual cues like pictures or a checklist to walk through each step. Apps can provide pre-made visual schedules.

Plan Regular Mealtimes and Food Prep – Regardless of the planned activities, sticking to regular mealtimes provides an anchoring daily routine. Depending on your child’s interests and abilities, you may want to involve them in meal prep when possible to promote independence skills. Simple visual recipes aid comprehension.

Schedule a Balance of Preferred Structure/Unstructured Activities – Autistic children may thrive with structured, planned activities at certain times, whether pursuing special interests, having a scheduled library or museum outing, or engaging in a creative project. Equally vital though, is unstructured downtime to simply relax, daydream, and decompress through self-directed play and solitary special interests.

Structured choices could include:

• A nature walk or outdoor exploration
• LEGO or building activities
• Arts and crafts like painting or clay sculpting
• Coding lessons or video making
• Sports, frisbee, or movement games
• Board games and puzzles
• Baking or cooking projects

When scheduling, allow ample flexibility to honour your child’s energy levels and cooperation on any given day. Having activities pre-planned helps provide security. Changing course and being flexible in implementing those activities reduces power struggles.

The Importance of Downtime in Weekend Routines

Build in Quiet Time or Sensory Breaks – No matter the activities, dedicated rest and recharge periods are crucial. Schedule opportunities for quiet, calming pastimes like:

• Reading or being read to
• Listening to audiobooks or music
• Rocking or cuddling with a weighted blanket
• Watching a preferred TV show or playing quietly
• Progressive muscle relaxation or gentle yoga

Consider your child’s needs for solitude or parallel interactive time during these segments. The restored energy after a break enhances cooperation and enjoyment.

Maintain an Evening Wind-Down and Bedtime Routine – As the weekend day winds down, consistent bedtime routines promote quality sleep patterns and ease anxious feelings around transitions. Your routine may include:

• Quiet play or dim lighting
• Removing screens
• Taking a bath
• Putting on pajamas
• Brushing teeth
• A bedtime book or story

Replacing stimuli like bright lights and electronics with soothing activities allows the nervous system to discharge excess energy and relax. The predictability of ending each day the same way also reinforces expectations.

Throughout all aspects of your weekend routine, an affirming, validating approach keeps your child’s neurodivergent wiring and sense of self at the centre. This type of inclusive framing nurtures identity safety and confidence.

Putting It Into Practice

Creating a visual, structured weekend routine provides invaluable support – but it’s just the first step. Implementing the routine compassionately, adjusting as needed, and upholding an affirming mindset is vital as challenges arise.

Remaining calm and patient while validating feelings reduces escalation if meltdowns or shutdowns occur due to routine disruptions. Scripted stories can help explain unexpected changes.

Adjusting expectations around your child’s energy levels and mood shows you respect their autonomy and embodied experiences. Forcing participation in activities rarely ends positively.

The weekend routine is not meant to be rigid – it’s thoughtfully designed scaffolding, always prioritizing meeting needs first. Make revisions and seek feedback often to uphold the process of co-creating an affirming, joyful weekend experience tailored to your unique family.

The most powerful traits for creating a successful weekend routine are flexibility, empathy, creativity and an unwavering commitment to respecting each child as they are. Neurodivergent children experience the world through phenomenological lenses we may never fully grasp – but providing them tools like consistent routines to enhance selfhood, independence and understanding is the greatest gift.